“If Women Are Gold Diggers, What Do We Call The 17 Men Eating His Food?” - Mary Njoku Questions Double Standard

Nollywood actress and filmmaker Mary Remmy Njoku has sparked a conversation about the different standards used to judge men and women who benefit from wealthy people.

In a post shared on Instagram, Mary painted a scenario involving a wealthy man named Emeka who returned home after becoming successful and suddenly had 17 grown men constantly around him. According to her, the men eat his food, wear clothes he buys, have their bills paid and enjoy his generosity while proudly calling themselves “his boys.” Yet, she noted, nobody questions their motives or accuses them of staying around him because of his money.

Instead, their relationship is described with respectable words like “brotherhood,” “networking” and “loyalty.”

Mary then pointed out what she sees as the irony. She questioned why a woman who spends time around the same wealthy man and benefits from his generosity is suddenly subjected to scrutiny, with people quickly labelling her a “gold digger.”

The actress asked what exactly the 17 men benefiting from the man’s wealth should be called if enjoying a wealthy person’s generosity automatically makes someone a gold digger.  

According to Mary, the issue is not that people are attracted to wealth or opportunities, because men and women alike naturally gravitate towards people or situations that can make their lives better. She argued that the real problem is the double standard in how the behaviour is described. When men benefit from being close to wealthy people, she said, society often gives it a respectable name. But when women do the same, the description suddenly becomes negative.

Mary concluded her argument by suggesting that the difference is not necessarily who benefits from wealth, but what society chooses to call them.

Her post has since sparked conversations online, with many debating whether society unfairly reserves the “gold digger” label for women while overlooking men who similarly benefit from wealthy friends or associates.